Lloyd blinks, eyes adjusting to the glow of Zelos' visible ether lines, and breathes out a quiet laugh. "Yeah," he answers, keeping his nerves tight in his grip, making sure to watch his words, to keep calm around Zelos and interact with him like a normal person, damn it. "Sleep and I have a complicated relationship in that it hates me."
That isn't a lie, and he says that in a completely joking tone - even before the angel transformation, Lloyd always had a hard time falling asleep. Back then, it was mostly because of excitement, rushing and roaring thoughts coming and going like high tide. Lloyd's pulled many all-nighters in his life, simply because sleep evaded him like nothing else in life. Even if he has trouble now with a combination of forceful angel abilities and persistent nightmares, it's not like it was ever really easy for him to fall asleep.
"Sorry," Lloyd says, as a second thought, shooting Zelos a sheepish grin. "I should have let you know I was going to walk away. Forgot you were on the first watch."
And then the words escape him, and Lloyd's left scrambling for his thoughts, anything he could use to keep some kind of conversation going before the awkward silence is felt by them both. Unfortunately, everything his mind gives him are collections of times long gone - inside jokes, taunts and teases, knowledge that his Zelos had granted him that don't apply to this Zelos, that he can not and never will forget. He can't toss an arm around this Zelos' shoulders and pretend that he's the same Zelos Lloyd once knew. This Zelos doesn't deserve that, doesn't deserve to have his own identity stripped away from him again, and Lloyd remembers the moments of his own Zelos' quiet vulnerability when Lloyd saw first hand what it could do to someone.
He will never do that to any Zelos, no matter how much this confusing and, frankly, entirely painful, experience leaks into the thin bandages on Lloyd's heart.
"U-um," Lloyd stutters, desperate to leave that train of thought behind and cut off the growing awkward silence. "Would you like me to come back? I could take watch if you wanna sleep."
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That isn't a lie, and he says that in a completely joking tone - even before the angel transformation, Lloyd always had a hard time falling asleep. Back then, it was mostly because of excitement, rushing and roaring thoughts coming and going like high tide. Lloyd's pulled many all-nighters in his life, simply because sleep evaded him like nothing else in life. Even if he has trouble now with a combination of forceful angel abilities and persistent nightmares, it's not like it was ever really easy for him to fall asleep.
"Sorry," Lloyd says, as a second thought, shooting Zelos a sheepish grin. "I should have let you know I was going to walk away. Forgot you were on the first watch."
And then the words escape him, and Lloyd's left scrambling for his thoughts, anything he could use to keep some kind of conversation going before the awkward silence is felt by them both. Unfortunately, everything his mind gives him are collections of times long gone - inside jokes, taunts and teases, knowledge that his Zelos had granted him that don't apply to this Zelos, that he can not and never will forget. He can't toss an arm around this Zelos' shoulders and pretend that he's the same Zelos Lloyd once knew. This Zelos doesn't deserve that, doesn't deserve to have his own identity stripped away from him again, and Lloyd remembers the moments of his own Zelos' quiet vulnerability when Lloyd saw first hand what it could do to someone.
He will never do that to any Zelos, no matter how much this confusing and, frankly, entirely painful, experience leaks into the thin bandages on Lloyd's heart.
"U-um," Lloyd stutters, desperate to leave that train of thought behind and cut off the growing awkward silence. "Would you like me to come back? I could take watch if you wanna sleep."